A journey of Defiance and Destiny

The little girl was barely 7-8 years old when she started questioning. She didn’t understand why things were the way they are and why was she asked to keep quiet! The curious mind did not find answers and she kept thinking. She was a dreamer of sorts, wanted to fly and touch the clouds, feel the air up there, wanted to paint … and dance till she couldn’t stand! Her passion for dance was noted by all; as she was at peace when she danced…. her wandering heart found solace through the moves and music calmed her racing thoughts!

The how’s and whys never could find a befitting answer. Her conversations with her paternal grandmother sometimes anchored her thoughts. There were times when they spoke about the Gods…. being a devout Hindu, her grandmother would often talk about the good things Gods did for their believers… in terms of getting a boon through meditation and sacrifice. The magic of doing good and being kind to others and how the effects were on oneself. All these conversations would spark the excitement in the tiny eight-year-old.

Little did she or her grandmother realize that a strong opinionated thought process was being formed. So when the little girl would ask why were ladies in the kitchen and men went out to work and why couldn’t it be the opposite? She was told that that was how the system was made…. men went out to work and ladies did all the chores at home. It was at that point in life she made up her mind to change this system for herself at least. Her grandmother did encourage her though only to pacify the little girl at that moment, not knowing she had already ignited a fire to stand up for herself and speak her mind. Her Dad, would keep her excitement of the world beyond the school and home alive; he would talk to her about foreign lands and opportunities ladies had there. The freedom to choose the life they wanted to live, unlike our customs and beliefs. Told her that, as long she was doing good and was grateful to God, she can achieve anything she put her heart and mind to!

The 8-year-old is now a mother to a 13-YEAR-OLD, who has the same energy and banter! And often reminded of her younger self! Change is the only constant she now understands and took the decision to be a single parent and take life head on; challenges and adversities never seem to allow her to rest! She’s picked courage from her dad’s words, maybe her grandmother’s influence, maybe her own experiences, she allowed herself to flow rather than drown at the atrocities of life. Though many of her questions have been answered and now that she’s seeing things differently, her wandering mind and excited spirit have inspired her to be the wind beneath her daughter’s wings and allow her to soar high!

– Pretam Lotekar