Path To Self Discovery

1st Phase 

Have you ever told this phrase, “You have changed a lot, ya!” It’s common, right? We are either told this, or we say it to others. I have been told this phrase hundreds of times.

 It is said that the environment in which you grow directly affects how the individual will form his personality. So that’s how i created this personality of a very fun, jolly, and talkative type of kid who lives in a family of 11 members and all of them are quite jolly and happy individuals who always liked to stay happy and share happiness. At that time it all seemed pretty normal, mostly because I was just a kid full of hormones just ready to create some mischief. It was this age where most of the fun memories were created.

My family was also very supportive in bearing all the mischief I did and never ever let me feel that i should change my personality. This reminds me of a situation when  I and my family were traveling on early Monday morning from Panchgani to Pune,  I vividly remember this situation where i spoke nonstop in a 2-hour journey and no one said anything harsh to me the entire time i was talking nonsense. My father who was driving the car was trying his best to concentrate on the road while i was blabbering away utter nonsense. This still gives me a shock to know that i was that kid before.

I also remember making a good amount of friends while i was in this age, maybe because people or the other kids really liked the way i spoke and expressed myself. I guess they saw me as a fun person to hang out with. What can i say, maybe having this kind of personality has its perks.

2nd Phase- Me being like  Ishaan from Tare Zameen Par

It is also a fact that i changed my school midway from 8th Standard onwards. It was in the middle of my 8th grade when I decided to shift to a school in Surat. This wasn’t any normal school, this school specialized more in Arabic studies and Arabic literature. This was a very big change in my life as i had to completely change the environment that i had been brought up in and also the family and friends that i had made with my personality back then. The biggest change that occurred was that the environment changed so drastically that i became this very quiet and reserved kid in the 5 years that i spent there. Maybe you can call it that i was very focused than before but  I vividly remember this instance of when i returned back home for my holidays, seeing that i had completely changed,  it was hard for me and the people i knew to mingle and catch up.  This was mostly because of how i reacted to the new set of people i met and also the way they weren’t as supportive as my parents and friends were at that time.

Do you know of this feeling when you enter a new place or meet new people you tend to be a bit quiet and conserved before you finally feel comfortable to open up. Well in my situation imagine this for a period of 5 years. It was as if i never got out of that phase and really felt my original personality once again. This was a bit frustrating and shocking to me at first but soon that too became a part of my personality.

Despite all of this, i learned a very important part of my personality that i was able to mix with a certain type of people, and also i was able to differentiate who would be a good friend and a companion.

3rd Phase- Me being like Karan from Lakhsya

After spending a good 5 years at Surat i finally decided to drop out as i simply lost interest in what i was studying there. Thought it was a difficult decision to make as i had made good connections by then and also a deep connection with that place itself. After returning back i was re-introduced to the original environment that i was brought up in. Only this time i totally emerged as a new person. A new personality that my childhood past was completely unknown. This was a phase of maturity where there was a blend of both of my personalities. 

But something different about this phase was that i was actually coming to some conclusion and acceptance on how to accept this personality and accept how i am and also be thankful for the same. I later found that when i started shifting towards self-acceptance, my relationships with different people, lifestyles, values, and life in general drastically started changing towards a more positive environment.

At the moment i never thought about these changes until i started writing this blog, which really makes me satisfied with how these changes have turned out. The main lesson i learned from this is how important is to accept something, be it some situation in life, or some bad thing that happened if you reach that level of acceptance life only gets better after that.

Just like every stage that I passed through in life, I made these observations about how my personality was changing and how I kept learning more about myself. At present, as I see myself I realized how important each of the personalities shapes the way I am today.

Today people still recognize me as a little quiet person but not reserved and i personally fell really proud of that. Even in situations when this realization hits me i don’t let that get me down rather make efforts to change my thoughts and pay more attention to people, family and other relationships.