From Shivam to Shiv

Hello, I was Shivam, and now I’m Shiv!

What does that mean?

Have you ever felt that you have had a transformation?

I have felt it and even experienced it. 

I can say Shivam was short-tempered, dependent, getting into fights for no reason, wanting to win every small thing. Also, Shivam had no scope, no opportunities, no growth environment, liked controlling things, confusion, lack of confidence.

I still remember that day when my dad said that I couldn’t go out of my hometown for my further studies. A year ago, in school, I was excited that Yesss would soon move out of my hometown and explore a new world. I started making a to-do list of what I’m going to do. 

But when the actual time came, my dad said I couldn’t go.

He didn’t say that I can’t. But one day we were at my shop, when a customer came, who was also a President of a college which resides in my hometown—replaying those moments. Those were the times of vacation, so admissions were open in all the colleges. And my dad knew him. So in front of me, he said, “Iska Admission Karna Hai,” and I was like, what? Dad, No please (in my mind). 

I couldn’t say no to him; I wanted to; I was dying to say no. But I couldn’t.

A lot happened after that, from asking my friends for help to crying myself in the room. Then, in those three years of college, nothing went as expected; I could not control things. 

When I joined Enterprise India Fellowship, things finally started aligning. I joined in April 2020 when the pandemic hit. While everyone was worried about the world’s future,  I was in my room working for more than 12 hours in the day. In a lockdown, who knew I would wake up at 5 am and sleep at 1 am? All those early morning meetings and working till late-night were stressful because I did all that work for the first time. Though it was fun learning new things. I enjoyed every minute of it. I didn’t want to give up. I still remember every night I slept like a log, like a baby. I felt satisfied and fulfilled. 

The journey had its ups and downs. However, that nagging feeling that I wasn’t living up to my potential was finally gone. I no longer had sleepless nights worrying about whether I was productive. Through the hustle, I kept telling myself, “Yehi toh chahiye tha”, I’m on the path of the journey that I was searching for.

However, after all these happy hours, something was still missing. I enjoyed work hours, but I was still in my hometown, which I was tired of. And this time, it was a big valid reason not to move out of my hometown – The Pandemic. 

After college, in April 2020, I was going to shift to Pune for further studies, but the Covid hit. I waited for nine months, and then I finally got a chance to move out. Things started happening my way. And now that I’m out of my comfort zone, I am much happier. I’m a different person now. Things have fallen into place the way I wanted them to.

My Enterprise journey has made me into the person I always wanted to be. I have transformed into Shiv from Shivam

I’m a different person now. I’m Shiv. Calmer, focused, confident, a little bit independent, and no more trying to win arguments, simply saying, “You Win, I lose.”

Starting on this journey, I had no idea what would happen. But I trusted the process, didn’t try to control things, and let them go as it passed by.

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